Saturday 30 August 2014

Cold Call Calamity - British Gas & Virgin Media

Let me just point something out to call centre staff all over... IF YOU COLD CALL SOMEONE, YOU ARE JUST A NUMBER ON THE PHONE, A VOICE, YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY, I DID NOT CALL YOU, I DO NOT KNOW WHO YOU ARE, YOU HAVE NO SECURITY CREDENTIALS!

I say this because I've had two calls this morning, the first from purporting to be from British Gas, and the second supposedly from Virgin Media... Both have my ire, and both just got up my nose...

lets dissect, the first call came from a Nottingham number, an 0115 land line number, so I was willing to answer... Wondering who would be calling, there are NO BRITISH GAS resources here, so I answer and this is how it goes:

Me> "Hello"
Click, click, clunk

And I can hear a lot of chatter, from a call centre, or at least a room full of a lot of people farming scams on telephone...

Me> "Hello?"

And finally, a voice, with a very strong Indian accent...

< "Hello"

Its a very strong accent, and a very deep voice, almost like a novelty voice...

Me> "Yes, hello?"

< "Hello"

Okay, creepy...

Me> "Who's speaking please?"

< "Can I speak to Mrs Xelous?"

Me> "Who's speaking please?"

< "This is British Gas"....

If he'd have said Korma Gas, or Rogan Josh Gas, I'd have had him onto the wife in a shot, but instead British Gas... with a Nottingham number, going to an Indian Subcontinent Call Centre... This is what is screaming "SCAM!" to me.

Its a local number, and NOT a local line, nor a local accent... Well, not local outside of certain corner shops (no I'm not being mean, I'm just stating the fact this guy was Indian, and did not say "duck" at all, so it was a big give away he was not in Nottingham, not Britain).

Me> "You may speak to me"

< "No, Mrs Xelous"

Me> "I'm the co-account holder"

< "And your name?"

Me> "If you're British Gas and looking at our account details, you can see my name, so you tell me"

< "No you must pass security"

Me> "You called me..."

< "Security, your password, can you tell it to me?"

Me> "No, you just called me, you could be anybody... Prove you're British Gas, you pass my security, how much was my last bill?"...

And the phone hung up... I've been and looked and British Gas seem to call everyone via local internet routing, so I was talking to this guy on a collective IP based network voice link, and it was being routed over the internet to the UK and then out of a Nottingham based service provider.  That explains the number, but the behaviour if the call centre staff is appalling, and I had a good chat with a colleague about how they should handle this.

And Irony upon Irony, my phone rings again, its an 0800 number this time...

So I against my will, but out of curiosity, I answer... And the comic accents carry on.

This time, we have a very deep feminine voice with an extremely strong Caribbean accent, I'd like to say where exactly, but Jamaica, or St Lucia... Somewhere there, I'm not an expert.... So she's called me....

< "Hello"

She's a head of the British Gas man, she's said Hello...

Me> "Hello"

(I swear to god, I heard her suck her teeth)

< "Where Mrs Xelous?"

Me> "Pardon?"

< "Mrs Xelous please"

She's just fucking rude, simple as, no telephone manner, no politeness, just plain rude...

Me> "She's unavailable, who's calling pleaser?"

< "Virgin Media"

Me> "Well, you can talk to me about our account"

< "Give me your password"

Me> "No, you called me"

< "Password please"

Me> "I don't think you understand, you could be anybody, you called me, I do not know you're from Virgin Media, you just cold called me..."

Teeth definitely sucked this time...

< "I'll call back later"

And she just hung up...

Now this is just weird, two calls, both from different companies, both asking for the wife, and neither able to grasp that they were asking me to basically reverse the security order of normality... 

BRITSH GAS  and  VIRGIN MEDIA... If these were your call centre workers, they sucked, they sucked so bad I've come to my blog to record their attitudes for posterity.


The numbers I was called from:

British Gas - 01159540170

Virgin Media - 08004089341

The latter number is apparently a legit Virgin Media number, which has called other people http://community.virginmedia.com/t5/Other-Queries/Call-from-Virgin-Media-0800-408-9341/td-p/1161229

And these other recipients have also said " they swiftly went off the call..."

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